Valentine’s Day: A Journey Through History and Love

The Basilica di Santa Maria in Cosmedin, Rome, Italy, proudly displays the skull of St. Valentine, recognized as the patron saint of lovers. Hallmark made this Christian feast day infamous after a Christmas slump in card sales, printing their first St. Valentine’s Day card in 1916. They haven’t looked back since.

There are many legends associated with St. Valentine, leading scholars and theologians to believe there was more than one man. Apparently, in Roman times, Valentine was a popular name. On February 14th, many men named Valentine were remembered for their martyrdom in the name of Christianity. The pagan Roman Empire persecuted many Christian souls before Constantine converted around 300 AD. These martyrs’ stories have interwoven over centuries, forming the romanticized image of St. Valentine we cherish today.

In the 18th century, the story of Valentine was embellished. It is said that one of these Valentines wrote a very romantic letter before being executed, signing it “From your Valentine”—a phrase that has endured through the ages and become synonymous with expressions of affection.

Love isn’t something that I’m qualified to write about as each of us defines it in different ways according to our experiences, cultural influences, and beliefs. Is love an act? Is love a verb? Is love a feeling? Is love pain? Is love a sacrifice? Love is so much more than all the clichés. It’s around us every day, manifesting in both grand gestures and quiet moments of kindness and connection.

However, I can emphatically relate to Khalil Gibran when he wrote, “Between what is said and not meant, and what is meant and not said, most of love is lost.” His words resonate deeply, reminding us of the importance of sincerity and clarity in our expressions of love.

What does love look like to you? Think about that for a moment and hold onto that definition in times of adversity. Maybe it’s putting down your phone to listen to your child, partner, or colleague. You don’t have to spend lots of money to express your love or go for a fancy meal. Although that is not great for the economy, one day of splendor and attention is doomed to fail if every one out of 365 days we celebrate love.

What are the foundations of a loving relationship? Is love reserved for certain people? What comes first, self-love or love for others? What conversations have or have not been loving?

I believe Buddha, another man surrounded by many legends, once said, “When you like a flower, you just pluck it. But when you love a flower, you water it daily.” This quote beautifully encapsulates the idea that true love requires ongoing effort and care.

Do you tend to your garden each day?

A Personal Reflection

In my own experience, I have found that love is not just a fleeting feeling but a continuous act of nurturing and understanding. One memorable Valentine’s Day, I decided to surprise my partner with a handwritten letter expressing my gratitude for the little things they do every day. However, I will release the letter at a later date. It was a simple gesture, but it brought us closer and reminded us of the importance of appreciating each other daily even when we are apart. Not to forgetting breakfast also.

Happy Valentine’s Day, Dea.